Favorite Things

(Don't tell the other Things)

It's always been hard for me to name my favorites because I feel like that locks me into one, and I like so many different things. I don't wanna leave anything out. I think it drove my kids crazy when I couldn’t answer their questions about my favorite color or food or animal. They probably just wanted to make or gift me something I would enjoy, and “I like allll the colors!” was unsatisfactory.

I have decided, though, that May is my favorite month in Oregon¹. Everything is so lush and green and overgrown that it feels tropical here, and so many times this month I have stepped outside, expecting it to be cold because it is cloudy and raining, and found it to be 65°. Maybe you think that’s cold? But I’m an Oregonian, through and through, and 65° is almost perfect.

Public speaking has not ever been my favorite, but I was honored to be asked this month to speak for one of my graduating volleyball players at her senior banquet. I had months to prepare, but in the last week before the banquet, I really had to psych myself up. The script I told myself was that it's only four minutes of my life, literally. And even though I'm speaking to a room full of people, there is only one person I need to worry about and that's the athlete that asked me to speak for her. Nobody will probably remember what I say and unless I really make a huge mistake, my speech is not going to stand out that much. I repeated this script more and more as the day of the banquet came around.

I think it's a script that will work for a lot of things. Really—how much time does this thing I dread actually take?

I will not choose a favorite flower but I will say my favorite right now is the peony, in its peak. We were at a farmer’s market a couple weekends ago with our oldest daughter, and she and I both noted how our hearts ached and our eyes watered at the site of so many beautiful, fluffy, colorful peonies. They didn’t have the same effect on Tim.

The great thing about peonies is that I can enjoy them at markets for weeks before mine at home are at that perfect marshmallow stage. I wish they lasted longer, but this staggering of blooms gives me maximum enjoyment of their short life.

“No matter how long beautiful things endure, they cannot out-endure our longing for them.”²

My favorite day of the week is the one when all my family comes over and I cook for them and listen to stories and we play games. We played Taco Cat Goat Cheese Pizza for the first time a couple weeks ago, which proves we are not a complicated people—give us a simple game and throw in a reason to slap people (‘s hands) and pound the table, and we’ll have a good time. Not everyone has to play the game or be involved in the stories. Just having them there is a treasure.

My favorite way to fall asleep right now is praying. It used to feel rude to fall asleep in the middle of a conversation with God, but now I just view it as comfortable familiarity, like a long marriage. I am opening the door for God to speak in my dreams, too, and right now there’s nothing I want more than for him to give me a word (if you’ve been following along, we’re still not completely settled on where we’re moving to this summer). I’m sure he’s speaking; probably, I’ve fallen asleep too soon.

My favorite way to read my Bible these days is to have my Bible app read it to me while I am art journaling. When the reading is over, I will turn to a blank page and write my prayers in a script that nobody could ever read, and then I will collage and paint over the top of it. I usually leave myself a little clue about what my prayers were that day, but it's a way to be private and thoughtful about it.

I had a day last week where I kept repeating I just feel so discouraged. It was mostly a case of several negative things piling up on me at once, but I could feel that I was retreating inside myself. Courage had been taken away, and man, do we all need courage.

The next morning, I scribbled my prayers in my art journal and texted friends who would pray for me, and by the afternoon I was once again encouraged—filled with courage for all the challenges. That's my favorite. I also took inventory of the mistakes I’d made that contributed to my discouragement. Some of it comes from outside, some from inside.³

My favorite walk is in full glory right now, and I managed walk number two and three of my Fifty Walks Before Fifty project. If you give something capital letters it makes it feel More Official, so that’s where I’m at with this commitment.

My last favorite for this list is getting rid of stuff. On Memorial Day we really dove into the decluttering of this home we’ve lived 13 years in, and it’s just so good to let go of stuff. All our belongings are in three categories: keep, yard sale, or garbage. My “keepers” have to pass this test: has sentimental value; gets used weekly or seasonally; seasonal stuff was used in its latest season.

It feels good to take a little inventory, to nail down the good things right now. It’s June on Sunday. Middle of the year. Beginning of summer and time for a different schedule. Everyday is still unknown but it helps to orient myself within time and space. Here we are, and here is our Helper, and here are all the good things around me.

1. Check back in October.

2. Elaine Scarry, On Beauty and Being Just

3. Also, hormones. Why have I still not figured out that my hormones do, in fact, affect my ability to handle stress? Oh that’s right—because they keep changing.